Goodbye’s Suck…

In the last 6 months it feels like I have had to say goodbye A LOT! And really I have, I had to say goodbye to friends that were holding me back, I had to say goodbye to friends who were lifting me up and encouraging me as I moved away, I had to say goodbye to bad food, goodbye to free time as I exercise and now today I had to say goodbye to a relatively new friend and I forgot how hard it is and how much they, for lack of a better word, suck.

We have the same sense of humour, we laugh at and make the same kind of jokes, we get each other coffee, we get lunch together, we talk about our lives together, he helped me move and transition down here, gave me advice on cars, boys and life and we have shared a lot of great times together. It wasn’t really until the last week when he told us that he had a new job and would be moving on, that I realise how much I respect and admire him.

He is a couple of years older than me, he has a great apartment in the city, a steady boyfriend, a new great job, great friends, and is one of the most down to earth and funniest guys I have ever met. We tried to motivate each other to go to the gym (sometimes successful, other’s not so much) and he was a great motivator to not eat so many Cronut’s and Pop Tarts at my desk.

Today due to a family emergency it was his last day in our department and as he emptied his desk and passed a lot of things onto me, it only hit me how much I will really miss working with him. Regardless of how bad the day was, he could always make me laugh and lift the mood, no matter how mind numbingly boring it was, we could always talk about something light and fluffy and the day was that better. Now I have to face the fact that I am back to square one and I’m not going to see him everyday anymore.

As I finished my shift, and we said our final goodbye, I realised that I am sick of saying goodbye to people and situations in my life. I know we are meant to love change, embrace change, accept change, but as much as we can try, I just hate it so much sometimes. With so much change happening in my life, I just want to freeze time for like at least a year and having things stay as they are, the more I thought about this, the more upset I got. I don’t want anyone to remain stagnant for a year, I wouldn’t demand that anyone halt their life for the sake of anyone else’s comfort. It is important for us as humans,especially in western society to keep changing, to keep moving, to keep growing and keep improving.

So it is with a whole heart that I wish him all the best on his new job role, that I say congratulations, you are deserving of this promotion and I hope it propels you forward into a career and a life that you love. As for me, I am still learning to deal with change, learning to let go and how to move on when things feel chaotic and out of control.

How do you deal with change? Let me know in the comments below….


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